She knew she would die out here. But she had come to this realization weeks ago, it didn't make any difference now. Even though Poison had saved her and taken care of her, even though the guilt she felt for leaving surpassed the guilt she had felt when she had found out that she wasn't welcome, she had to do it. There was no place for her at the diner. She didn't belong with them or with anyone else for that matter. She was destined to be alone. Everybody was anyway. In this world you lived alone and you died alone. Just another body piling on top of the devastation that lingered over every creature of the desert.

The flashlight she had stolen from Poison's room flickered nervously in the dark, almost as if to scrutinize her decision. The supplies she had taken wouldn't last her very long and she had no idea where she was or where she was going. Her whole body was aching and she was cold, wearing only the oversized sweater and the shorts they had given her. Still, she thought, better than being a stray, an outcast among a what seemed like a superior group of rebels. She had heard stories about freedom fighters, elusive, hidden in the outskirts of the zones, planning, waiting for their time to start a revolution. But did she really believe all that? Did she really believe that there were people who were willing to go against the arbitrary power of the corporation? It sounded wack, too good to be true. And it was too tempting to give in to that fickle glimpse of hope. Too easy. She discarded the thought. No one would save the world.

But the fact that they occupied that diner, had access to electricity, running water, weapons, supplies; all of that made her feel very uneasy as to who they were, where they had come from and what they did there. They surely couldn't be just ordinary rebels. She had spotted a radio, even a functioning radar at the diner. The four men had looked strong, physically fit, clean and groomed for the most part. All of that didn't matter anymore, she thought, why even bother. Whatever it was that they were doing out here, sooner or later they too would realize what a waste of time and energy it was. They too would wish for death.

The moon hung above her like a ghost but she was thankful for the light, she wanted to save what little she had left of the flashlight. Soon, she was crawling up a steep hill, heading for what she hoped was a cave that she had spotted from a distance. A sigh of relief escaped her as she realized her eyes hadn't played a trick on her. The cave was more of a rock shelter but it would do for the night. Although she was freezing, she decided against a fire and instead wrapped herself in the blanket she had taken from the bed.

The bed. Poison's bed. That he had given up for her. Again, she felt the guilt, making her sick in her stomach. After nibbling on some tasteless crackers, she fell into a dreamless, uncomfortable sleep.

*

It was easy enough to find her. Not only did he know the area surrounding the diner like the back of his hand but she had chosen his lookout to find shelter. He sighed, thinking about what Jet had said.

'Maybe it's best to let her go. We aren't responsible for her, you know.'

He couldn't just let her die. Which she would, out here by herself, not nearly enough food and water, still weak from her injuries. What a waste that would be, after caring for her for a week, to just let her go now. Poison wouldn't admit to himself that he always wanted answers. He had interrogated rebels and dracs alike and he wasn't used to not getting the information he needed from them. The girl had left without a word and it made him even more curious as to what she could have possibly have to hide.

'Hey!' he nudged her foot with his, not too hard but hard enough to startle her.

She jumped up, almost hitting her head on the rock, holding her hands in front of her face, blinded by his flashlight. It took her a few seconds to realize who had found her and when she did, she lowered her arms in resignation.

'Not a very smart move. This is usually where I keep watch.' he explained, squatting to pick up her backpack. 'If you're so eager to take on my shifts, at least let me make you a Killjoy first.'

The change in her demeanor when he uttered the word 'Killjoy' was unexpected. She still seemed hesitant to come back to the diner with him but she looked at him now, not as afraid anymore and her blue eyes big with curiosity. Still shaken up, she followed him down the hill, clutching his arm tightly in order to keep herself from falling. His body tensed up at her soft touch, not being used to it. And although he would have to do a lot of explaining, he didn't regret his decision to tell her. After all, he wanted her to stay, at least for now and more secrecy would have made her mistrust them more, with the possibility of driving her away again. He realized that the only chance she had at survival and the only chance he had at obtaining approval from his friends to let her stay, was to make her one of them. Poison had no idea how, or if it was even doable. So far she hadn't been exactly cooperative.

'Listen, I'm not gonna force you to come back. If you wanna leave, you can. You can have some of our supplies and go your own way. But I would advise against it.' she had let go of him again and they hurried back to the diner.

'And it would really help if you could stop it with the silent treatment.' he sighed. 'Telling me your name would be a start, before the others come up with stupid nicknames.'

*

For someone as strong as he was, a natural born leader, capable of killing, making hard decisions and difficult sacrifices, willing to risk his own life for his group of rebels and others, he seemed weirdly sensitive whenever he spoke to her. Almost weakened by her presence. And she felt guilty for making him feel that way. He was right, too, her refusal to talk to them didn't make this situation any easier for any of them. She took a deep breath.

'S-Sky.' she whispered, not knowing how she had found her voice again.

He stopped dead in his tracks and turned around, looking stunned. As if he had seen a ghost. And clearly, he hadn't expected her to speak.

'Sky.' he repeated, not to her but to himself.

She nodded, avoiding his gaze. It was intimidating. The only thing that still gave away his authority.

'Did you choose it yourself?' he asked, as he turned back around and resumed walking, a bit slower this time.

Sky shrugged. Honestly, she couldn't remember. She couldn't remember anything from her childhood, let alone how she had gotten that name. For now he seemed satisfied with her response.

'Did you choose your name yourself? Poison...' her voice still sounded weak and she couldn't help but feel surprised at hearing it.

He turned around again but kept walking. A smirk crept across his lips.

'My brother chose it for me. I chose his name for him. Kobra Kid. The tall one with the hair you saw this morning is Jet Star. The other one Fun Ghoul. Those are our Killjoy names anyway.'

'What are your real names?' she asked.

'Real names? Umm...' he looked confused. 'I don't know. We never really bothered with that. I never had a real name, I think.'

Something they had in common at last.

It didn't take them long to get back to the diner. She must have been walking in circles when she had left earlier. Suddenly she felt not only guilty, but incredibly stupid for running. Sky stopped a few steps away from the door.

'Sorry I left.' her voice merely a whisper again.

He turned around again, letting go of the door handle he had already grasped.

'Don't feel bad. I would have done the same. In fact, I have.' he looked at the ground.

She wondered what he meant by that. For someone who had urged her to talk, he wasn't saying very much.

'Take your time.' he muttered, giving her a shy, encouraging smile, before he walked into the diner.

A Killjoy. They only existed in the legends that lost children whispered to each other in the dark, while hiding from the demons that roamed the country, too scared to hope, too naive to give up. Yet one had saved her and another three were inside this building in front of her. What if he was messing with her. What if he had only said that in order to make her come with him. If she had ever searched for an answer, out here in the wasteland that remained, this was the closest she had come to finding it. Even if it was all fake, living a lie was still better than death. So after taking a deep breath, Sky followed Poison inside the diner.