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Mibba

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Until Forever Ends

By Myself

My fist slams into the power button on the radio, anger and fear running through my veins. A bit of relief washes over me though, because Better Living seems to not know who I am; just that they have a former citizen wanderng the Zones. I have no doubt though that they'll soon figure out my identity. Running my hands though my short damp hair, I take a deep breath and close my eyes to think. There will be Draculoids patrolling the desert. How far out they'll go, I have no idea. I'm not even sure which Zone I'm in. Even though this place is big and eye catching, staying here is probably my best bet. Canned food is plentiful, as are bottled drinks, and there are necessities like toilet paper and gasoline. I'll have to camp out here for a few days before I stock up and head back to my car. Speaking of my car, I hope they won't find it and they'll just think I died out here. After some time passes, the searches will relent.

Knowing there's nothing else to do but wait, I go back to the aisle with the water and pick my mask up off the floor. In the corner of the store behind the check out counter is a closed door. It's locked, but after three kicks, I break it open. The room looks like an old office, with a desk, a few chairs, and a computer that won't work because there's no electric. Nobody has computers anymore anyway, except BL/ind. I sit my mask down on the desk and start to open drawers. There's nothing but some old paper, a pen, some paper clips, and a stapler. Sighing, I close the drawer I was looking in and go back to the store, shutting the broken door behind me the best I can.

Now that the pandemoneum has died down, my stomach takes the liberty of growling loudly to remind me of my lack of food. In the canned goods aisle, I see soup, vegetables, fruit cocktail, tuna, Spaghetti-o's, and a few cans of PowerPup dog food. Seeing this stuff is like Christmas morning; there's such a variety of things to eat! Picking up a can of chicken noodle soup, I look at the label and wonder if there's any way for me to cook this. I could set up a small fire behind the building, but then again, I would basically be sending a signal for Korse saying [i]Here I am! Come and get me![/i] Would it be worth it?

Darkness has fallen over the Zones, and with a peek out the back door of the station, my decision of whether or not to make a small fire becomes a yes. The smoke that the fire will make most likely won't be seen, and the fire itself won't be too large, so the light of it will also go unnoticed from a distance. I quietly close the door behind me and grab a bundle of firewood I had seen laying at the end of one of the aisles. Now I just need something to start this fire. Maybe there are lighters at the counter.

Sure enough, there are little flat holders with lighters standing in them. I also notice something I didn't before: cigarettes. A small smile forms on my lips as I pull a pack of Marlboro menthol from the tray. I started smoking cigarettes when I was sixteen, and had to quit at seventeen when Better Living took over after the Wars. They banned smoking from the city because it was obviously unhealthy. I know I shouldn't smoke, but it's a small luxury that I do quite enjoy. These cigarettes are probably stale, but I don't care. Checking the lighter, I find that it works, and moving the wood and can of soup under my arms, I smack the cigarettes against my palm, packing the tobacco. I rip the plastic and foil off, stick the butt of a cigarette into my mouth, and light it. The first drag makes me slightly lightheaded, but the second is enjoyable. I smile.

The fire is small, and it takes a few minutes for the wood to actually catch. The can of soup is sitting on top of two pieces of wood, the pop-top of the can opened a little to let steam out. I sit cross legged next to the fire, smoking a cigarette and mentally cursing myself for not having my jacket. At night, the desert is cold. Once the soup starts to boil a little, I put my cigarette in my mouth and quickly grab the hot can from the flames, sitting it beside me. After it's cooled slightly, I drink the soup from the can by the light of the fire. When I'm done, I put the empty can next to the back door, stomp out the fire, and go inside. Suddenly I feel very tired.

Laying back in the swivel chair with my feet on the office desk, I stare up at the ceiling and think about today. I've successfully escaped from Battery City. Better Living Industries knows. They have been watching me for weeks. Months, even. Better Living has sent out their finest Scarecrow operative in search of me. Surely I'm not that important? I am alone out here. I've found shelter. I saw my mother, which is impossible, but she led me to find said shelter. I have no idea how long I'll last out here. I also have no idea what will happen tomorrow. After what feels like forever, I eventually drift off into a restless sleep.

When I wake, the sun is just starting to peek over the horizon. The sky is a beautiful palette of pale blue, orange, and yellow. I stand from the chair and stretch out my tense body. Sitting in that position all night definitely cramped my muscles. As I stretch, I feel my shoulders sting. The sun definitely got me yesterday, as my arms, shoulders, and chest are all badly sunburned. Wonderful. I'll be looking like a lobster for the next few days. My mission for today, however, is to simply wait. I need at least a day to draw the Draculoids away from me. I'll need to entertain myself somehow.

After a small breakfast of stale, dry Cocoa Puffs and a bottle of orange juice, I sit outside in front of the store. Leaning my head down to light a cigarette, I lift my eyes to look around the area. Still no sign of anybody. This is good. By tomorrow, I should definitely be able to set off in the direction of my car.

The heat is already rising, even though it can't be any later than seven thirty. I can see actual waves in the distance, and I know today will be even hotter than yesterday. Thank heavens I found this little sanctuary. When I feel my burned skin start to sting from the sun, I flick my cigarette butt and go back inside.

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[i]Thump... Thump... Thump...[/i] The sound of the bouncy ball hitting the window is the only noise here. I'm sitting against one of the shelves, lazily bouncing it onto the floor. It jumps off the floor, onto the glass window, and back to me. I don't know how long I've been doing this for, but it seems to be the only entertainment I can find. The radio was on for a while, but there were no transmissions, only static. While bouncing the ball, my mind drifts away.

An image of my mother smiling pops into my thoughts. She was always so beautiful. I miss her more and more every day, especially now, since I had seen her in the desert. My mouth forms into a twisted frown as I think of how my family lost her. I was seventeen. My younger sister, Violet, was six. My father was thirty-eight and my mother passed away at thirty-six. All I can think of are the flames. The hot orange, almost blue, flames that licked away at her porcelain flesh. Tears begin to pool in my eyes, threatening to spill. This thought is unwelcome. Blinking my eyes and furrowing my brows, I try to think of something else. Her eyes. Those beautiful green eyes. The way they sparkled whenever she laughed. And her voice. It was so graceful and delicate; her laughter like wind chimes. I remember her reading to me when I was little. I remember how happy the family was when Violet came home from the hospital. I cherish all of those memories. But I'm bitter, with an everlasting hatred for Better Living Industries because I'll never be able to make any more. The rubber ball ends up changing course and bouncing away from me.

With shaky hands, I pick up my pack of cigarettes and lighter. I put the cigarette between my lips and light it. After taking a long drag, I exhale the smoke slowly, then suddenly I snap. Jumping up, I start throwing things off the shelf. Boxes of stale crackers, jars of peanut butter, anything that's within arm's reach gets thrown recklessly at the walls. A bottle of corn syrup lands into one of the glass doors of the drink refridgerators and the bottle, along with the door, shatters.

"FUCK!" I scream. "I FUCKING HATE YOU! FUCK YOU IN THE ASS WITH RUSTY BARBED WIRE BATTERY CITY! FUCK YOU KORSE! COME AND FIND ME YOU MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH! SO HELP ME GOD, I WANT YOU TO, BECAUSE WHEN YOU DO I'LL FUCKING RIP YOUR HEART OUT WITH MY BARE HANDS!"

Then I hear loud, gurgling, choked noises, and it takes me a second to realize the sounds are coming from my own throat. I fall to the ground, old food and shattered glass around me, and sob.

Notes

I know this chapter is very short. It's really just a filler because I let my boyfriend read each chapter before it goes up (funny, I know) and he had told me he felt like the story was moving too quickly. So this was just to lengthen it up a little and not make one thing after another, after another was happening. I PROMISE THE GUYS WILL BE IN THE NEXT ONE.

Title:
By Myself by Linkin Park
This song represents Lilianna's internal battle with herself. What she should do about Better Living Industries, about living in the Zones, about whether or not she'll be able to trust anyone, etc. Also it talks about her being stressed to he limit, and eventually losing her mind.

Comments

this is really good! please update, i'm hooked x
I really love this. Really want to see what they do.
hotmidnightstar hotmidnightstar
6/26/13
This is good. Update soon :)
VRose VRose
6/1/13