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She Always Gets What She Wants

Chapter 38

Gerard’s POV

“Bleh, what is this?” Mikey glared at the cup of coffee in his hands as if it was trying to kill him.

I chuckled, leaning against one of the kitchen counters with another cup in my hands. “Mom bought a different kind, because it’s cheaper.”

“Yeah, there is a reason,” he grumbled, walking over to the sink and emptying the contents of his cup. “No one will ever buy this shit otherwise. It’s disgusting. Why aren’t you complaining? You tend to be pickier than me.”

I placed my mug on the counter next to me and walked over to one of the cupboards, opening the door and pulling a bag of coffee blend from behind a box of cereal with a triumphant smile. “I went shopping.”

“Why the hell didn’t you tell me?” he demanded, snatching the bag of coffee from my hands and setting about making himself a proper cup.

Another chuckle escaped from my lips. “That would have been too easy. Plus, this was very entertaining. You should have seen your face.” I was definitely enjoying this too much. Mikey thought so too, judging from the dirty look he shot my way.

I grabbed my coffee back off the counter and took a sip of the delicious dark liquid. “Hey, did you hear Brittany come home last night?”

“No, but her room is empty. Chances are she stayed over at Kasey’s house. You know those two are almost as inseparable as you and Frank.”

I frowned. I was curious to know how her night had gone. Did she have a good time? Did she behave herself? Mikey seemed certain that she was with Kasey, but I couldn’t help wondering.

“Good morning people!” Frank greeted cheerily, coming in the back door. “Looks like I’m just in time for breakfast,” he said hopefully, pressing down on the table and looking at us with bright eyes.

“Bad coffee is more like it, but nothing to worry about, Gerard saved the day,” Mikey informed him, shaking the bag of coffee. “You want some?”

“Sure.” Frank pulled out a chair and sat down while I put a bowl, spoon and box of cereal in front of him. The milk soon found its way to the table too.

“So, where’s Brittany?” Frank wanted to know, setting about making his cereal.

Mikey shot me a wide-eyed look, knowing as well as I did that we couldn’t exactly tell Frank that his girlfriend, who had gone to prom with her ex, never came home the night before. It’s not that I expected the worst of my little sister, but Frank might just. I didn’t want to be the one to cause any trouble.

I forced out a laugh. “Passed out in her bed. She came home really late last night.”

“More like this morning,” Mikey added quickly as backup to my lie.

“I’m guessing it was quite a night,” I finished, feeling guilty for shamelessly lying to his face, but it seemed like it was for the best in that moment.

“Oh,” he shrugged, thankfully buying the whole thing. He dipped the spoon in the bowl and then shoved it in his mouth. “What time are we leaving for the show tonight?” he wanted to know once he finished chewing and swallowing.

Mikey visibly relaxed and also took a seat at the table, armed with both their coffees. “The bar only opens at five. Maybe we can leave a quarter to. That way we’ll be there when the doors open, giving us time to prepare and set up and stuff.”

“Yeah, but we’re only playing at eight,” I pointed out, finishing my last sip of coffee.

“We can hang out beforehand.”

I knew Mikey only wanted to go and get drunk. He’s been doing that a lot since Syd left. I wish I could help him feel better and keep him away from the alcohol. I knew how that ended. Alcohol was not the type of friend anyone needed. Unfortunately there was nothing I could do about it. I’ve talked to him and explained to him what I thought, but clearly he wasn’t going to find other coping mechanisms. I couldn’t convince him that there would be other girls. He will fall in love again. Then again, I’d probably feel the same if Melania left.

“Why not,” I reluctantly conceded.

“Sounds good to me,” Frank agreed.

I watched my best friend eating breakfast, blissfully unaware of my inner turmoil. My siblings were stressing me out. Mikey wasn’t okay and I had no idea where Brittany was, but I had a bad feeling. I used to have a lot more faith in my sister before she started dating Frank. Ever since, I’ve seen a different side of her, a side that I didn’t particularly like. She was definitely no saint, although I wasn’t sure where she learned any of her tricks. She didn’t get it from Frank. At least I knew that much.

“Right, well, I have to go get new strings for my guitar and change the old ones before tonight. I have some errands to run for my mom as well. I’ll see you guys later.” With that Frank was up and out the door again.

It was silent in the kitchen for a while before Mikey spoke up. “We’re going to have to inform Brittany of our little lie when she gets home otherwise Frank will know we lied.”

I nodded in agreement. Brittany finally showed up over an hour after Frank left and she looked like hell. She looked tired and hung over and not at all like the teenage girl who had left the house smiling the night before. There was a sudden urge in me to find that Trey guy and beat the crap out of him. Frank never let her come home looking like this. Angry? Yes. Upset? Yes, but never a complete mess. I was more than grateful that our parents weren’t home.

“It’s about time you got home. Where have you been?”

Her shoes were held in her right hand, her make-up was smeared and her hair a mess. “I passed out at Kasey’s, Mom,” she muttered sarcastically, walking right past me and to her room.

My feet swiftly followed her. “Did you have fun?”

I didn’t get much of a response unless you considered the grunt she gave. I decided to try a different angle. “Frank was here looking for you earlier.”

“I’ll call him later.” With that she shut the door in my face.

I turned around and saw Mikey looking at me questioningly. I shrugged not knowing how else to explain the situation.

*

“Hey, Gerard?”

My head turned towards Frank where he sat on a small bench in the “dressing room” at the back of the bar. It was more like an old storage space.

“Where’s Brittany?” he asked.

It was a relief to be able to tell him the truth this time. “She’s at home, sleeping off her hangover.”

“Is she really? You can tell me the truth you know?”

I looked at him confused. “I am.”

“Then why did you lie this morning?” he wanted to know, catching me off guard. “Yeah,” he smiled wanly. “I know. I always know when you’re lying.”

“Frank…”

“She never came home last night, did she?”

“No,” I admitted regretfully.

He stared down at his feet and I was suddenly mad at my sister. Frank didn’t deserve this. What was I supposed to tell him?

“She’s home now and she’s fine. A little tired and drunk maybe, but she’s okay. She said she passed out at Kasey’s house.”

“And do you believe her?” he asked, looking back up at me.

Fuck. “Why shouldn’t I?” It was the best I could do at that moment.

Frank sighed, grabbing his guitar and getting to his feet. “We should get going. We’re on in five minutes.”

“Frank, what are you going to do?” I knew he couldn’t just leave it. They would have to talk about it eventually.

He looked down at where I was still sitting cross-legged on the floor. “Nothing. I’m going to give her the benefit of the doubt.” He slung the guitar across his shoulders. “I’m going to wait for her to come to me. Whatever she tells me, I’ll believe her.” He left me then, heading for the bar area where we would perform in a couple of minutes.

Maybe I didn’t give them enough credit. Maybe they’ll surprise me. Here’s hoping.

*

Frank’s POV

I was more than slightly buzzed walking home from Gerard’s house. The show had been great and afterwards we had stayed at the bar and celebrated. It was good and I felt good. The house was dark, because it was late and my mom was probably long asleep. For that reason I tried to be a quiet as possible going in the front door. It was really dark, but my eyes adjusted quickly. I locked the door once inside and hung the keys on the hook. It was eerily quiet, but maybe my booze befuddled mind was trying to get the best of me.

“Frank?” A voice spoke from the dark when I snuck past the living room.

“Shit, fuck! Brittany?” She practically scared the shit out of me.

She turned on the lamp next to the couch, clearly illuminating the room. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

I was a lot more sober after the shock. “Hey,” I said softly, walking over and sitting down next to her, taking her hands in mind. “How was prom?”

She shrugged, looking down at our hands. “It was okay. It would have been a lot better if you were there.”

She looked tired, leading me to believe that she hasn’t had much sleep. “Did anything interesting happen?”

“Kasey went with Jill. They’re finally out in the open. People stared at first, but they didn’t really say anything so I guess it’s okay.” She smiled faintly. “Now the only person Kasey still needs to tell is her mom. I don’t blame her for not wanting to, though. Her mom… Yeah, you’ve met her, haven’t you?”

I laughed at the memory. “She’s kind of scary.” Brittany nodded in agreement.

“Why were you sitting here in the dark?” I wondered.

“Your mom let me in.”

“You could’ve waited in my room. At the very least you could have made yourself at home, had some coffee or something.”

“All I wanted to do was talk to you. That’s why I’m here.”

The benefit of the doubt. Whatever came out of her mouth next, I would believe her.

“Frank.” Brittany shifted, turning her whole body to face me. “Last night. Prom was okay and then we went to an after party at someone’s house. Everyone was having a good time except me, because I missed you.”

I gave her hands a squeeze. “I missed you too.”

“No, Frank.” It was her turn to grip my hands tighter. She was clearly nervous. I’ve never seen her like that, which in turn made me nervous, because it couldn’t be anything good. The benefit of the doubt. “This is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. You’re going to hate me.” She looked down sadly.

I didn’t say anything. I refused to let my thoughts get ahead of me. She wouldn’t do that to me.

“I slept with someone.” She did. Her eyes were focused on my face, searching for anything that could give away how I felt. Contrary to what I would’ve expected that was all she said. She didn’t try to explain. She didn’t make any excuses. Her words were left hanging in the air by themselves.

Again I was made the fool. Again she cheated on me with Trey. I told her I loved her. Did she only pretend to feel the same? I didn’t do any of this for myself. I had trusted her.

“I’m done.” It was a barely audible declaration, but she heard it, because she pulled her hands from mine.

I couldn’t even look at her anymore. I let her in and this was how she responded…

Brittany stood up without saying a word. I didn’t even watch her go. Before she left she spoke again. “Frank, I’m sorry.”

I heard the key in the lock and the door open and close and then it was silent again. The house was silent and so was everything inside of me. It was over.

*

Gerard’s POV

I heard the front door open and close and saw Brittany storm past the kitchen. Something was wrong. I left the fresh cup of coffee on the table and headed straight for her bedroom.

“Brittany?” I gently knocked on her bedroom door. Sounds of crying could be heard coming from inside and I decided to let myself in. Brittany was lying face down on her bed, crying. She was startled when I sat down on the bed next to her. Obviously she hadn’t heard me come in.

“Did you just come from Frank’s house?”

She nodded, whimpering into the pillow.

“What happened?”

She let a few more tears run and a few more sniffles later she finally managed to say, “We broke up. It’s over.”

I had to sigh. Another fight. Another breakup. “You’ll work it out. You two always do.”

She shook her head, finally looking at me. “Not this time.”

“Are you sure? What happened?”

She turned around, her tear stained face looking up at the ceiling while she tightly clutched a pillow to her chest.

“I don’t even blame him. After all, I cheated on him.”

“What?” I was stunned. Yes, I expected something, but not quite this. She admitted it so easily.

“It was the after party and everyone was having a good time, but me. All I wanted to do was go home. People were clinging to each other and getting wasted. I was bored…”

“You were bored?” I asked in disbelief.

She let out a miserable little laugh, wiping the tears from her eyes. “Gerard, you have no idea who I am. You don’t know what I’ve done.”

“Enlighten me.” I was mad at her and not just for cheating on Frank, but what she was doing to herself… She wasn’t thinking about anything anymore. I wondered if she ever considered the consequences of her actions.

“Frank and I have always hated each other. I never blamed him, after all I was a real bitch to him, but only because I was jealous of how close the two of you were. You always chose his side over mine. You always chose him over me.” More tears spilled from her eyes. “I hated you for it. And I hated him.”

Her words shocked me. I never had any idea she felt so strongly about it. Maybe my part in this was a lot bigger than I realized. “Brit…”

“It’s true. Things are different now, but you can’t deny it. Mikey will agree with me on this. At least he handled it better, but I was a little girl who wanted nothing more than her big brother’s attention. I practically idolized you.”

I frowned deeply. “I’m so sorry. I had no idea…” I knew no apology would ever be enough.

“It’s okay.” Her tears had dried by now. “After you and Frank graduated and left for the city it was only me and Mikey, but Mikey had Syd so I barely ever saw him either. I was about fifteen and my friends and I somehow got into one of the older kids’ parties. We didn’t realize that there would be college kids at the party. We all made excuses at home and then went to the party.”

I didn’t like where this was going.

“Someone at the party had these brightly colored tablets…”

My heart sank at her words. “Brittany, no, you didn’t.”

“We said no at first, but everyone else was doing it and we were curious so we took some too.”

My head dropped into my hand. I slipped up. My little sister was an addict, but why wouldn’t she be? She was simply following the examples Mikey and I set for her.

“The next day at school we all agreed never to let it happen again. We didn’t feel good after coming off the high so of course we wouldn’t want to do that again. One of the college guys had taken my number and invited me to another party. After that it was all I could do. I loved the feeling I got after using and everything else that came with it.” She looked nostalgic saying this and my heart sank further. “I managed to sneak out of the house almost every night from then on. Sometimes I would get friends to cover for me. Other times I would use my bedroom window. Mom, Dad, Mikey… they had no idea what was going on with me. My grades were dropping. I was tired all the time. Also…” She stopped talking, looking sad for a moment. “Then one day Trey and Kasey had had enough. They threatened to tell on me and refused to leave my side once. They practically babysat me every minute of every day for weeks until they were finally sure that I wouldn’t go back again. It was a forced rehabilitation. Those first few days I hated them. It was hell, but once I was clean the gratefulness came forward. I don’t know where I would have been if it hadn’t been for the two of them. They didn’t abandon me regardless of all the horrible things I had done.”

“So you’re clean?”

“It was only for three short months, but ever since I got clean I never once used again, until last night.”

“Is that why you cheated on Frank?” It didn’t matter why, but I had to ask.

“I knew the effect Ecstasy had on me, but when I saw that guy in the corner handing stuff out to people every now and again… I couldn’t help myself. I figured I wouldn’t be stupid enough to get hooked again. It would only be one time. I would have a good time and today everything would be back to normal.”

“That in itself was stupid.” I remarked.

“I know. So obviously one thing led to another…”

“Okay,” I got up and walked to the window. “I don’t need to hear anymore.” I turned to face her again. “Did you explain the situation to Frank? I mean, as far as excuses go, this one is pretty solid. It doesn’t make what you did right or anything, but if he knows that you didn’t mean to cheat on him, maybe you can work things out.”

Brittany sat up and shook her head. “No, I told him what I did and he told me to leave. The look in his eyes, Gee he couldn’t even look at me.” She breathed in deeply. “This was the final straw.”

“But if you explain it to him…”

“No. This was the last straw for both of us. He deserves better. I’m never going to stop hurting him,” she said ruefully, pulling at a thread in front of her on the bed.

“Why not? You can change. If you love him…”

“No, Gerard. He’s done and I’m done.” She suddenly let out a giggle. “You know how funny it was when you and Mikey first found out about us you were both so angry with Frank. You guys thought he stole my virtue or something when really he was the only guy to ever stick around afterwards.”

“I still don’t know how that happened.” I walked back over and sat down.

She moved closer to me and actually looked a little better. Getting everything off her chest was doing her good. Her cheeks already had a little more color in them.

“It was right after you guys got signed. Frank was supposed to meet you here, because you were all going to go out and celebrate, but you were late and he waltzed in here, annoying the crap out of me like he did best. I’m not sure if I kissed him or he kissed me, but I guess it doesn’t really matter. You have to understand that I was having a rough time or maybe it was one of my spoiled brat moments, I don’t know. I felt neglected. Mom and Dad were working a lot. You guys were never home always working on your stupid band. When I kissed Frank he was there. Sure I hated him, but in that moment I had his undivided attention and that’s all I wanted, someone to focus on me. I let things go their way. For some odd reason after that we didn’t stop either. We sneaked around for weeks before anyone realized it.”

“You’re making me old before my time.”

She laughed again. “I’m really tired, though. It’s been the longest forty eight hours since I went cold turkey. Do you mind?”

“Hey, Brit, are you okay? You’ll tell me if there’s anything else, right?”

She leaned forward and hugged me unexpectedly. “I promise I’m fine.”

I held on to her probably longer than necessary, but after everything she told me I felt like a failure of a big brother. I should have known. I should have been there for her.

“I really think you should explain things to Frank even if it’s only for the sake of peace. He deserves it.”

She looked thoughtful for a while before nodding. “Okay, I’ll talk to him.”

“Good night then.” I kissed the top of her head and pulled the door closed behind me. From now I would have to be a lot more observant, keep a closer eye on both my siblings, and Frank. It was my job to take care of them, of all of them.

Notes

Comments

YOU'RE BACKKK YASSS

@Ellie-phant

Hehe, that's a good thing!

Rumor...tAdA Rumor...tAdA
9/7/14

AWHHH!!
So many feels. <3

Ellie-phant Ellie-phant
9/7/14
I love this!
Ellie-phant Ellie-phant
7/17/14

@Rumor...tAdA
Ek sal probeer geduldig wees, want ek weet hoe jy voel... Ek is net so opgewonde om te sien hoe dinge uitdraai, want jy weet hoe lank ek al hierdie storie follow... ;).
xoxo
En LOL ek kry FRIENDS references vr byna enigiets imaginable... =p

pixiewayro pixiewayro
6/7/14